This could be HeaVen

Ok. Imagine a place where:

• You can go in a cab from one end of the country to another for 30 bucks max
• The taxi driver offers to teach you Tamilian (in case you don't know and are from India). Chatting with cab drivers should be avoided if possible. They are prone to talk on any tangent non-stop. Some are cute though.
• You need to win a license from an auction to be able to buy a car. The car is at a minimum twice the market price. Some licenses only permit you to drive on weekends (red license plate). All these measures are implemented to contain the number of cars in the country.
• You are REALLY fined for jaywalking (I mean I jaywalk all the time but its a namesake). Most youngsters just pay the fine (20 bucks) and do it again so the Government is getting serious about increasing the fine. At the same time, they don't want to overtax the senior citizen jaywalkers. So they are in a quandary. How sensitive.
• Only two types of housing are available - Government and condos. Most of the condos have a tennis court, swimming pool, play area, gym etc. This is possibly the highest expense if you move to Singapore.
• Government officials earn more than most private company employees. Forget corruption. People are scared to offer a bribe forget about taking it.
• You get charged per tissue in restaurants (okay its a wet wipe but wtf). It is given automatically as they seat you. You think it's free till you spot the 20-30 cents in the bill.
• Should I mention that the places are so damn clean I'm afraid to step out without taking a bath lest I defile the place? Even the areas where there are no venturas are kept spotless.
• There is virtually no crime here. The headlines in most newspapers are without any juice. A suicide some months back grabbed headlines for 15 days in a row. If you commit a serious crime, you disappear (but seriously). There was this guy who slept with his employee in return for some immigration favors. The cops got to him on her complaint. It was in the news for some days and then he disappeared. And no one bothered about it.
• You rarely spot a cop. Cops are happy if they fine someone smoking or dirtying a place once in a day.
• The variety of food is mind boggling. The crab meat available here is multi-orgasmic for want of a better word. I could gorge on it for all three meals. The number of food courts are mind boggling and very inexpensive. You can easily get by on 20 bucks a day for food. Going to the pubs IS expensive.
• Shopping is really really really a delight. And as I write, I only talk about my experience on Orchard road, CBD and Novena. For e.g. you get a Carolina Hererra Mens for 39 bucks - a 20% discount if not more. It costs even less in Little India they tell me. And no fakes. Remember the crime thing.
• Applying for any license and procuring it doesn't take more than 2-3 days. Most of it is online. The tax guys are more than happy to see you in the office. A friend who went to apply with his 75 year old father had the surprise of his life. They seated his father in a nice chair, took his papers, filed the same and gave him his copy.
• Tax rate is around 12-13%. Maximum is 19% I think for high category. Time to migrate methinx.
• The entire population (99.8%) is in top shape. No fat, obese or shapeless people. When I see their lustrous skin and muscles normally ripple through the skin, the whites of their eyes, shiny hair and white enamels, it reminds me of college. I worked hard then to get that and these guys are normally so full of health. It's really something.
• Most of the people have at least one item in black as part of their clothing. It corresponds well with their white skin - no doubt. Just an idle observation. Also, most of the girls wear skirts which are above knees. Which brings me to the next point.
• And last - the girls here have the best legs I've seen anywhere - period. This has got to be something to do with the DNA. This highly intrigued me. I haven't seen a single girl without good, better or knockout category of legs. I plan to find out why.

Welcome to Singapore. All this from my 5 days of work here. More to come when I experience the night life over the weekend.